Tuesday, February 14, 2012

2 weeks post surgery - not about me...

Today marks 2 weeks since Jacks surgery.  I found it quite amazing to think since he has done so well overall!  I was in the grocery store today and while I was scrutinizing a label of ingredients on a container of yogurt - Jack was giving his giant smile to a guy walking by in scrubs, with a scruffy beard and looked like he had not slept in days.....Jack raised is little right arm with his three fused fingers and "waves" to him and says "HI!".  Jack turns to me and says "Whzs Dat?!"  (as he asks with just about anyone these days..)  I simply replied "A man shopping for his groceries" and went back to my studying the massive variety of yogurt, hoping the scruffy man would leave us alone so I could find the best greek yogurt for the price without any high-fructose corn syrup and be on my way home.   The man came over and began to make small talk.  I just knew what he was going to ask.(What happened to Jack's arm?  What is wrong with his leg?)  I was not in the mood, although I pleasantly entertained his 'pleasantries' about Jack.  The man said,  "He has such blond hair...wonder why he didn't get your red hair?  He has such beautiful blue eyes and a great smile!  He looks like he has a wonderful personality."   "Yes, " I replied as i smiled at Jack..."he does seem to have a very positive outlook on things - not many things slow him down and I am sure that will take him far."   As we talked for another 10 min I found myself telling him about our challenges with Jack and how I have begun to realize this journey is not about me or jack - but about something bigger than us. ( I then found out he was a nurse just getting off the night shift and had 2 sick kids at home he was trying to help his wife buy groceries for...doh!) He paused and began to confess that he and his wife had a child that was developmentally delayed and it has been a real struggle for them also.  It was quite an insightful conversation...and just like meeting so many people - with or without struggles - I am beginning to FULLY realize:  1. We all have hurts and endure heartache that are only relative to what we know.  2. It is important to have support.  3. Don't ever judge someone based on anything. period. 

It brought me back to the devotion I had read this morning.  I had been reading this verse over and over after Jack was born, but my eyes were opened WIDE  when I read the excerpt from Charles Swindoll's daily devotional.  I have shared part of it here:

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
9 And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 10 Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. 

I need to underscore a foundational fact: God's goal is not to make
sure you're happy. No matter how hard it is for you to believe this,
it's time to do so. Life is not about your being comfortable and happy
and successful and pain free. It's about becoming the man or woman God
has called you to be. Unfortunately, we will rarely hear that message
proclaimed today. All the more reason for me to say it again: Life is
not about you! It's about God.

How can I say that with assurance? Because of Paul's response: "Most
gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that
the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with
weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with
difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong"
(vv. 9--10). That's it! He got it too. And he went with it for the
rest of his days.

When you and I boast of our strengths, we get the credit, and we keep
going under our own head of steam. But when we boast in what He is
doing in the midst of our brokenness, inability, and inadequacy,
Christcomes to the front. His strength comes to our rescue. He is honored.

Don't miss that point. The very things we dread and run from in our
lives are precisely what brought contentment to Paul. Look at the
list: I am content when I lose. I am content when I am weak. I am content
with insults. I am content when I'm slandered. I am content in
distresses. I am content with persecutions. I am content with
difficulties and pressures that are so tight I can hardly turn around.
Why? "Because when I am weak then I'm strong."  Knowing that
brought the apostle, ablaze with the flaming oracles of heaven, to his
knees. What a way to live your life---content in everything---knowing
that divine strength comes when human weakness is evident.

That's what gave the man of grace true grit. It will do the same for

Excerpted from Charles R. Swindoll, Great Days with the Great Lives

Boy, some days I feel like I have a long way to go.  My human nature and my immaturity gets in the way... I feel compelled by what Paul learns to hold tightly to in his life - to be content no matter what the circumstances.  I feel in this American - gotta have it now - not content with anything -culture we live in feeds the frenzy of dissatisfaction about our personal, physical, and even spiritual life.  Somedays, I truly want to go live on an island to detox from all of it...

Sorry, got off on a tangent...Back to Jack...He's been keeping busy. Its been a good thing. Since, I have found new ways to distract him so he does not get frustrated with not being able to walk.  He has taken it pretty well so far, and from what i have seen - he is not too keen on putting any weight on his Right leg for now. (and he is not really supposed to).  He is doing a lot of kneeling and crawling.  We have received  overwhelming support from our friends and family with things to do for jack.  From books to play dough to puzzles.  I am starting to feel like I am running a pre-school with color time, pretend play time, learning letters, numbers and words. It makes me sad that Jack is truly not my baby and learning so very much!   Here are some pictures of this past week!

"No- Line all the cars up by COLOR mommy...come on...!!"

Mommy says I have to keep my foot propped up while I eat... I like this "TV-tray" idea...I could get used to this....

Stocked up on essentials - snack mix, GOLDFISH and cookies!

A nice surprise visit from our former neighbors :)  Jack warmed up to them just when they had to leave... of course...

Robert, Jack, John

Our favorite new book!  This is the best!  Thanks Mrs. Kramer!!

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